Tuesday, December 3, 2024

Navigating Trauma: Women’s Lived Experiences with Bipolar Disorder

Navigating Trauma: Women's Lived Experiences with Bipolar Disorder

By Onika Dainty

Bipolar disorder affects millions of people, but for women, the experience can be different, especially when trauma is involved. Women with Bipolar disorder are more likely to face trauma than men, adding another layer of difficulty to an already challenging condition. It’s a heavy burden, but one that can be understood and managed with the right tools. In this blog, we’ll explore personal stories, the connection between trauma and Bipolar disorder, and what healing can look like.

Understanding Bipolar Disorder in Women

Bipolar disorder is marked by intense mood swings—highs (Mania or Hypomania) and lows (Depression). It can feel like an emotional rollercoaster that never stops. While both men and women experience it, women often face unique challenges, especially when trauma is involved.

For me, trauma shaped how Bipolar disorder showed up in my life. Childhood sexual abuse and later gender-based violence (GBV) left scars that made my Bipolar episodes more severe. I didn’t understand how connected these things were until much later.

The Intersection of Trauma and Bipolar Disorder

Trauma changes everything. For women with Bipolar disorder, it can make the symptoms worse, and often, the trauma comes long before the diagnosis. Whether it’s sexual abuse, domestic violence, or other forms of trauma, the effects can linger for years.

I was 14 years-old when I was sexually assaulted. It sent me into a deep depression that felt like it would never end. I became anxious, dissociated, and eventually turned to substances to numb the pain. It wasn’t until my grandmother’s death—another trauma—that I had my first manic-psychotic episode. That’s when the connection between trauma and my Bipolar disorder became painfully clear.

Coping Strategies and Resilience

Facing trauma is hard work, but it’s necessary. One of the most helpful tools for me was therapy. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) helped me confront my fears and negative feelings about myself and men. It wasn’t easy, but it made a world of difference. CBT practices like exposure therapy helped me confront my subconscious fears  toward men that I carried with me for many years. I began to practice radical acceptance which does not mean I approved of my trauma but rather it’s an acknowledgement that my trauma happened but cannot be changed.  

I also learned the power of breathing exercises and tapping (EFT) to release tension. When things got too overwhelming, I would tap specific points on my body and take deep breaths. It helped calm me down. And when that wasn’t enough, I reached out to my support team or called a crisis line. Sometimes, just voicing what you’re feeling makes it feel a little smaller.

Seeking Professional Help

If you’re dealing with trauma and Bipolar disorder, getting professional help is crucial. Trauma-informed care makes all the difference. It’s about understanding how trauma has shaped you and working with professionals who know how to treat both your trauma and Bipolar disorder.

I’ve found support through Durham Mental Health Services (DMHS), COPE Mental Health Program, and Ontario Shores-Durham Community Clinic. It’s not always easy to find the right care, but it’s worth the effort. Keep going, even when it feels hard.

Stories of Empowerment and Recovery

Recovery isn’t a straight line, but it’s possible. Forgiveness, for both myself and those who hurt me, was a big part of my healing. I had to learn to stop letting the past control my present. That was a turning point. I stopped being the victim and became the victor over my past trauma.

Many women have stories like mine—of trauma, Bipolar disorder, and ultimately, resilience. Their strength and courage show that while the journey is tough, it’s not impossible. With the right tools, support, and mindset, healing can happen.

Final Thoughts

Living with trauma and Bipolar disorder is tough, especially for women who face unique challenges. My unaddressed trauma shaped my identity and how I viewed the world. It took time but facing my trauma with the help of my healthcare and support team was the best decision I have made for myself in my Bipolar recovery. Through sharing our stories, we can help others find strength, understanding, and hope. If you’re struggling, remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. There’s a path forward, and you don’t have to walk it alone. Let's continue to have conversions that take us beyond the stigma of trauma to a place of self-acceptance, self-love and forgiveness.


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